Redneck for a day

We had a great time yesterday at 'The Boat'. One of my bestest friends, Mary, (which may or may not be her name) hooked up with us and we had the most fun catching up.

I spent part of the time there pointing out people to her and asking who they were.

"Ok, who's THAT? He looks familiar. I oughta know THAT woman...who's she?"

One guy, in particular stood out. He had on a straw panama-type hat with a tropical print band around it, a kerchief tied around his neck, shorts and a pair of those 'Croc' clogs in a lovely shade of sage green.

Not exactly standard attire for The Boat. Or for Bath, in general, as far as that goes, where the usual "manly" attire is a ratty t-shirt or a plaid shirt with the arms cut out (a la Larry the Cable Guy), jeans and a seed corn cap. Sunglasses are optional.

Ziggy looks at us and says, "Who's the old queen?"

Mary informs us that it's "so and so". (I ain't mentioning any names)

Me: "Nooooo. That OLD guy right there", pointing him out.

Mary: "I'm tellin ya...it's 'so and so'.

Me: "But he's OLD."

Mary: "So are we, dumbass."

Ok, so she didn't really say that. But she was thinkin it, I know.

It was hard to wrap my mind around that. The last time I saw this particular guy, was probably...oh...at least 25 years ago. He was always a fine lookin guy...one of Havana's "elite". Or at least one of the ones that thought he was. Ya know the kind I'm talkin about....the football hero with rich parents and every girl in three counties throwin her panties at him. The hard-drinkin, hard-partyin guy who coulda had the world by the ass.

And now he just looks, for all the world, like an old, wrinkled, gray-headed queen.

Hell, I dunno....maybe he is. If it makes him happy, well then...good for him. And it could be that he's just watched one too many episodes of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. But it was still hard for me to grasp the concept that he's old. And I'm not. heh

Anywho, it was just an awesome day, all the way around. And we plan to do it again next month during the Redneck Fishing Tournament. It's August 26 and 27 in Bath, Illinois and if you're up for one helluva good time, I suggest you try to make it.

See, Bath sits right smack-dab on an offshoot of the Illinois River, which just happens to be inundated with

Asian Carp

. The fish were introduced here to clear algae and parasites that were causing problems for our local fish. But they've become an ecological nightmare.

Anywho, this tournament was created a year or so ago by one of my childhood friends and her husband. Coincidentally, they're also the owners of 'The Boat'. She explained to me yesterday that the tournament isn't done in any kinda 'traditional' way...you catch these big suckers with nets. Or wait for 'em to just flop in your boat. Whoever catches the most, wins the grand prize, though I'm not sure exactly what that is.

Can you imagine? A buncha drunks in boats, trying to catch these humongous (up to 70 pounds!)

flying fish

using only nets...or their bare hands? Whatta hoot!

I'll post more details as it gets closer to tournament time, but there'll be a beer tent, food, lots of contests for the kiddies and LOTS of laughing, I'm sure.

Anybody got a boat we can borrow or rent for a day?