Freakish...bizarre...quirky...

....and downright unuuuusual.

Can't help it. I've got a penchant for the odd. The weird. The rare. The eclectic. The idiosyncratic.

I don't want what somebody else has. I am not a lemming, dammit!

I want something...different. And that doesn't necessarily apply just to my possessions. It applies to the friends I choose, my hobbies, my sense of "style", my attitudes concerning...well, just about everything from politics to food (

Andrew Zimmern

rawks!) to sex.

Ok, that doesn't mean I have a fully equipped dungeon in my basement...or keep a sheep in the spare bedroom, ok? I'm not into the whips and chains thing, either. Although...uh....nevermind.

The fact that I adore the abnormal is never more apparent than when we're talkin about my tchotchkes.

I don't like a lot of clutter, so I'm not into "collections" of...anything. But I do have an...accumulation...of knick-knacks that ya probably wouldn't see in most decorating mags.

F'rinstance...



I got this little broad as a birthday present from some dear friends. I was tickled pink that they knew me well enough to know I'd love her. We're not sure what she is...I think it might be an ashtray, but it has a hole in the bottom, so I'm not sure how well that'd work. The hole in the boob, though...kinky.

Then, there's my newest acquisition...



I snagged her on a recent excursion to Pier One, one of my favorite places to browse...and unfortunately for da Zigster...buy. I'm pretty sure she's a modern take on

The Venus of Willendorf

. She reminds me of me. Except I have bigger boobs.

I do have one "collection"...



We've been gathering 'em down on the beach ever since we moved here. In fact, I even made myself a necklace out of one of 'em and wore it for my wedding. I love the delicate, whirly shapes.

'Course, livin right on the river like we do, I'm fond of most anything with a water-related theme.



I bet you could count on one...maybe two...hands the amount of people in the USA...at this very minute...who have a wicker carp on their coffee tables.

There are a few more...ah...eclectic...items floatin around here at the River Rat Retreat. But I'll save those for another day. I'm sure you're gettin bored. And so am I.