The "Enigman"

They say metrosexual guys are out...and real men, men who act like men... complete with love handles...are "in".

Perhaps not.

Or perhaps there's a whole 'nother breed out there...neither a metrosexual nor a man. Something inbetween. Something that's, as yet, unnamed.

Maybe the term "enigman" might be fitting. A man. Who's an enigma. An "Enigman".

See, Ziggy, though disdaining all forms of sports, televised or not (gawd BLESS him!), has always been a rather manly kinda man.

He abhors most of what passes for men's 'fashion', instead preferring jeans and t-shirts. He's definitely not lacking in the personal hygiene department, but he'd rather be caught dead than be found using any kind of "product" on his hair.

He loves him some porn, but prefers "real" women as opposed to the airbrushed binkies that most immature guys seem to be so enamored of. Though there are times that he's undoubtedly and completely a "man" at home, he behaves well when in public...no nose-picking, spitting, farting or ball-scratching.

Despite his membership in the Ay Ay R Pee, he's still got it goin on in the sack...but he doesn't do the normal "manly" thing...like roll over and go into a coma immediately after. Sometimes, after a little refactory time, he's even been known to...uh...shall we say "perk up"? again. My el toro viejo. Gawd bless that ole testosterone.

As far as the love handles go? Yup. He's got his share of those, too.

So, despite his lack of blatant...uncouthness...he's a "man", even though he's a man who's fairly in touch with his feminine side. He loves women and I think it's fair to say that he "gets" them...most of the time, anyway.

However....

As far as our tv viewing habits are concerned, I'm thinkin maybe we oughta throw a football game in now and then...and cut down a little on the HGTV.

Today, while he was getting ready for work, I had "Sensible Chic" on the tube. For those of you who don't know, it's a show where they try to replicate a gazillion dollar, decorator-created "inspiration" room for a couple hundred bucks. Ok, so it's generally more than that, but you get the idea. At the end, they always brag about how much money they saved in comparison to the gazillion-dollar room.

And this astute observation came from Ziggy:

"Yea, they could have saved even more money if they'd have used the second set of Japanese screens and just used a tea wash to tone down the color a little. They really looked more like the ones in the inspiration room."

And then he farted.

Ahhhh...THERE'S my manly Ziggy.

"I think the term "tea wash" is probably the absolute last thing I ever thought I'd hear come outa my mouth," he sighed.

My "enigman". Gotta love him.