"Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence."

H.L. Mencken

Ya just can't make this shit up.

(BELLEVUE, OH) — Police say a man in Bellevue, Ohio was caught on tape having sex with a picnic table.

Bellevue Police Captain Matt Johnson says Art Price, Jr., 40, was seen on four occasions between the hours of 10:30 a.m. and noon having sex with his picnic table. What makes this a felony, Johnson says, is that it took place in close proximity to a school, which made it likely that children could have seen Price.

The neighbor — who wishes to remain anonymous — saw Price walk out onto his deck, stand a round metal table on its side and use the hole in the umbrella to have sex.

Ya know, those holes in patio tables are pretty good-sized, diameter-wise, I mean. I wonder....naaahhhh. Nevermind.

(I could say something about...a squash. But only a couple-three people would...get it. heh)

The story snagged from Christine.