Friday, October 20, 2006

What dreams may come


Pun very much intended because, you see, I just had sex with Al Pacino. Not the Al Pacino of "The Godfather". Or even the Al Pacino of "Scent of a Woman", though that might have been more fitting.

Him bein blind and all, ya know?

No, it was the Al Pacino of "Dog Day Afternoon".

I know it was him because he wore a bandana around his head and yelled, "ATTICA! ATTICA!" when he came.


Let me back up a little here. (No pun intended this time) I was recently diagnosed with sleep apnea. Which I already knew. But a $3,500 study hadda tell me. Anywho, one of the symptoms of sleep apnea can be vivid, bizarre dreams. And really bad headaches upon waking. And I just had the mother of all bizarre dreams.

See, the last couple of days has been pretty rocky. I've felt...well...like shit. And I've slept worse than usual. So when I got home from work at noon, I got something to eat and decided that I'd try to take a nap.

I fell asleep almost immediately. And woke up in the midst of an orgasm.

Doncha hate it when that happens?

Yea, women can have "wet dreams", too. Except, they're not so messy. Well, I guess they could be, but....uh...that's prolly too much information, huh?

Aaaanyway, we were someplace like a hospital, only not a hospital. And we were in a swing. (I don't know. It was a dream, dammit!) Kinda like a porch swing, but smaller. Like a 'loveseat' porch swing and I was kinda on his lap. We were talkin and nuzzlin and kissin and just swingin back and forth. Kinda "lollygaggin" on each other, ya know?

But then we were in a bed and he had on a red bandana. And I had an orgasm.

ATTICA! ATTICA! ATTICA!

And then I woke up with a pounder of a headache. hehe. "Pounder". Get it? I didn't much care, though.

I might hafta rethink sleepin with a CPAP machine.

With dreams like that, who the hell cares if ya stop breathin once in a while?

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