Friday, October 15, 2010

What happens in Vegas... gonna wind up on this blog, I can tell ya that right now.

It's time, once again, for a "Grannies Gone Wild" weekend...and we're doin' it up big, this time. Big.

Really big. As in Las Vegas Big. With a capital 'B', even.

We're flyin out on the 28th and coming back on the 31st. Three nights and four days in Sin City. WhooooHooooo!

But see...the thing is...well...I've never flown before.

In an airplane, I mean. Or a helicopter, either, for that matter. There was that one time...I dropped that tab of speed...


It's not that I've been terrified of flying, you understand. It's the crashing that's always scared me shitless. That and the total, absolute lack of control I'd have. It's not like I can tell the pilot to stop so I can get off, ya know.

My life, for those few hours, will be totally and completely in someone else's hands.

I'm not real tickled about that idea.

But I figure...what the hell. I'll be 56 friggin years old next week. I've lived a good life.

And I'm gonna hit up my doc for a coupla Valium...just in case.


A commenter just reminded me that flying to Vegas entails flying over the Rocky Mountains. Now, all I can think of is the movie
  • Alive

  • And, didn't the whole
  • Donner Party
  • thing happen somewhere in the Rockies?

    Thanks, Randall. LOL


    At 9:03 AM , Blogger Peoria Anti-Pundit said...

    Key to this is simple. We (wife and I) fly out to Vegas 2 or 3 times a year usually right about now but this time the dentist got my money.
    It's simple. Before you board get yourself a Bloody Mary at the airport bar. Once on board, think of it this way, if you get into the air, then once leveled off, you can drink heavily. The rest of the flight is cool especially over the Rockies then when it comes time to land at Las Vegas, you won't even notice the warm air currents coming up from the desert rocking the plane as you see the strip of Vegas laid out below. Once the plane slams down on the runway the worst part is yet to come for you have to make the tram to the main part of the airport to get your luggage. If Alligent was any farther out, they would be in California. Enjoy!

    At 2:03 PM , Blogger Wil said...

    Such a shame you missed the "Golden Age of Flight". I don't envy you the mode of transport. Do, for the sake of your sanity, check out the TSA website for a discussion of what you may or may not bring. If you have a CPAP, call the airline and obtain the medical equipment tags which allow you to carry it on as an additional, no-charge bag. Do remember that you'll have to leave your distilled water at home. Finally, I strongly urge you to bring a good book and an MP3 player, even if you are traveling with a partner. While pretty much useless, a pocketful of surgical masks may help nullify the paranoia that arises from being in a small enclosed space with a large number of germ-ridden humans of questionable hygienic practices. And remember, the only pain upon crash landing that you would be aware of would arise only if you survive, so while plummeting to earth, be sure to slip your seatbelt off so you can kill the fat guy in the seat in front of you (the one who insisted on tilting his seat back into your lap from the moment he came on board...) by breaking his neck with your carcass as you go flying forward upon impact.

    Have a nice trip ... ;)

    At 12:14 AM , Blogger Nate said...

    Dang... I wonder if I could afford to drive down and catch up with you...

    At 2:04 PM , Blogger curmudgeon said...

    Bah. Flying is like riding a bus with the most awesome view you can imagine.

    Unless it's cloudy.

    At 10:11 PM , Anonymous Pammy said...

    "Once the plane slams down on the runway..." My point, exactly, PAP. LOL

    Thanks, Wil. I think. hehe

    Nate, that would be awesome.

    I'm thinking about the views, Curmudgeon. All. The. Way. Down.

    And I DID get a few Valium...just in case.

    At 12:59 AM , Blogger Cheesehead said...

    OK, I'm sure you'll make it there just fine so let me suggest you go see Elvis when you're there. Big Elvis, that is. He does a show at Bill's and it's really fun. His website is

    At 4:16 PM , Blogger Michele said...

    Nah, ya won't go over Donner Pass to get to Vegas from your house.

    Vegas is a blast!!! Enjoy! (and pictures, we need pictures!)

    At 8:47 AM , Blogger Elisson said...

    As someone who has been flying since I was two years old, I can tell you that you'll have a blast. As in "good time."

    Curmudgeon is right; I don't call it the Silver Aerial Bus for nothing. Think of it as a long-overdue adventure!


    Post a Comment

    Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

    << Home