Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Things I miss

Though it's not a meme (at least, I don't think it is),
  • Scott's
  • post about the things that he misses struck a chord with me. I can't be positive, but I'm pretty sure that I'm several (ahem) years older than Scott hence, more things for me to remember.

    Uh...make that more things that I've forgotten to remember I miss. Um. Nevermind.

    In no particular order:

    I miss that particular feeling of anticipation that seems expressly reserved for kids...the first day of school; the last day of school; your birthday and Christmas; heck, even a weekend. Oh, I still anticipate things. I'm not completely jaded. But that almost overwhelming feeling that you get when you're a kid and the time just can't move fast enough. Nowdays, I want nothing more than for it to SLOW THE HELL DOWN.

    I miss the smells. Don't laugh...I miss stuff like that. I miss the smell of Black Jack gum and Sen-Sen. I miss the smell of sheets that have been hung out on the line to dry. I miss the smell of the neighbor's freshly cut alfalfa...gawd!...was there ever a better smell than that? I miss the way the school smelled on the first day back...floor wax and fresh notebook paper and...I dunno what, but it always smelled the same...but only on the first day. The scent of my mom's roast beef hash baking....oh, and the steamy, slightly acrid smell of canning homegrown tomatoes. And, yea...that first sharp, immediately identifiable scent of a big ole joint...whoever said it was a 'sweetish' smell is nuts.

    I miss thinking that "I'm ONLY XX years old...I have my whole life in front of me. If I screw up now, I still have plenty of time to fix it." I wonder at what point that changed? I mean...at what age did I reach my own, personal...pinnacle...and start down the slippery slope? Or have I even reached it yet? And if I HAVE, why the hell didn't someone point it out to me? Because if I have, I was evidently too stoopid to have recognized it.

    I miss the innocence. Of everything.

    I miss common sense...oh, gawd...do I EVER miss that. Despite the relative innocence of the era that I grew up in, I think most people had a good share of common sense. And they weren't smart people, necessarily. Most weren't college educated. But they were far from clueless when it came to common sense.

    And courtesy. I miss that, dammit. And respect.

    I miss that thrill of getting the car for the evening. Like...the whole evening. It was a friggin lifetime. The evening was like a big, juicy plum...right THERE in front of me...waiting for me to take a big bite. A quick stop at the local gas station for a dollar's worth of regular, a pack each of Marlboro's and Juicy Fruit and I was off.

    I really miss wearing contacts.

    I miss my dad. I often think that there are things going on now that would absolutely send him into apoplexy. Boy, I miss him doing that. It was a sight to behold. He'd get all red in the face and his bright blue eyeballs would just...pop out...with his light blonde hair, he just looked damned... patriotic...lemme tell ya. He'd go into paroxysms of rage over some particular topic and then turn right around and say something sooo...off center...so damn dry and sarcastic and just scathingly funny. It was brilliant. Mom told me he even jumped up and down once when he was feeling particularly...apoplectic (over something done by moi...imagine that?). I missed it, dammit.

    I miss the Beatles. All of 'em. Together. I miss Jim Croce. And Jim Morrison. And Janis Joplin. And Harry Chapin. And I MISS DISCO! Ooook. THERE. I admit it. I LIKED disco. The Bee Gees. Donna Summer. Chaka Kahn. And YES...even The Village People. So sue me, already.

    I'm sure there are dozens of other things I miss. At least dozens. But I forgot what they are.

    But then...if I've forgotten the things that I remembered I missed...well...I must not miss 'em too bad, huh?

    Nevermind.

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